To the world I look normal , until a closer look is taken , I’ve yet to meet or talk to anyone who is like me .Its hard being different , but harder when you different and feel alone being so . So I find my self here and maybe here ill find someone who is like me .
I was born with only one knee ( no joint at all ), half a hip on one side and the other dislocated , I have had over 300 operations in my life so far , from pins, rods , plates , leg lengthen , hip replacements to name a few . Pain is second nature to me , good days and bad , Life in general is good , I guess , like most, its how I see it more than how it really is at times . I can walk some days others I cant and use my crutches or chair . Needs most so I just do as is needed each day . Yet the feeling off be alone is hard to shake , friends ..I have one or two , they don’t hang around when I spend months at a time in hospital , and I don’t blame them , they need a life to . The ones I have mean the world to me .
I am to most laid back and easy going , I live my life as I want to and I share what I feel I can . I have made a lot off mistakes and I will own up to them . Who’s perfect anyway .
Love … that’s a hard one , though I had found what love was , only realised lately that it wasn’t love , took my paraplegic friend to show me I didn’t have what I though I had . Now I wonder what’s next .
Life is not meant to be easy , but is it really meant to be lonely just because I am different and cant find a place to fit in . Will time cure the feelings I now face alone , or am I being self destructive in wanting to fit in at all .
To each a place in the world ….still searching for mine ………
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