WantHim

Thank you so much! He actually did contact me not too long after I freaked out! His phone was off so he didn’t reject my calls! He wasn’t making excuses (I hope/ think) he said he had a busy next couple of weeks and wouldn’t be able to meet.

I have to explain a bit about his situation to give you a clearer picture. He has been separated for nearly two years and has had to move back in with his mother as she has a ground level fully accessible room that was prepared after his accident 30 years ago. Also it didn’t make financial sense to rent somewhere when his mom was more than happy to her “boy” back home ! ?

We have only been back in contact for a couple of months! From what he has “shared” which is very minimal and like pulling teeth, is that his wife and he hadn’t had a sexual or intimate relationship in years and never really as satisfying as he had hoped for / wanted / needed.

Although he doesn’t typically contact me first, he does get back to me pretty quickly most of the time. I feel like he has his pride and insecurities for sure. He even admitted a while back about performance anxiety. I explained that it’s been a long time for me as well and largely because being in my 50’s well things don’t perform quite like a few years back! I knew there was still more so I did my research but really already knew most of what he has to deal with daily! Not long ago, I told him that I knew and understood and he could quiz me if he’d like. I also mentioned some other things that I believed about his personality, routines, and some feeling type things about us without saying too much. He said “I would say that’s probably pretty accurate “. I was thrilled with that response!!

We don’t talk about future plans, etc. but at the beginning he was very adamant that he was not looking fir anything “permanent”. Of course he isn’t legally available yet anyway. I’m not looking at marriage either… but I would love a committed long-term relationship at least. Who knows the future but I just know that I’m crazy about him and don’t want to lose what we have!

I do wish he would open up more but he is so guarded. He freaks over any topic or comment such as “ serious” or “we need to talk” etc…. I have to choose my words carefully. Also he does not give compliments other than emoticons but no hearts!! The word “love” would send him into cardiac arrest! Lol!!!

I’ve been advised on a general men’s forum that he is simply wanting a sexting buddy but why would he meet me even just for a few minutes on his way home after work? He has to drive 2 hours each way!!! You can imagine how exhausting that is for him. It breaks my heart and I worry so much about him! ?

So this is long and I will stop here. Any input greatly appreciated!!

Thanks so much. He blew me off this morning. I am so confused and beyond hurt. I thought we were really gaining ground and he was starting to really care then one night of texting where I didn’t feel like playing games and basically said so and he threw me out like the trash. He originally approached me via text and was relentless in his pursuit. After two plus years, I finally gave in to him and tried to meet his needs to the point of losing my own values. I was totally vested in the relationship. We had a very intimate meeting a week ago but were interrupted so things didn’t quite get completed but he was as very happy and I was on cloud nine. I got to show him how much I care for him. Yesterday I was trying to find out if we could meet again soon. He kept being sly and avoiding the question. Finally I’d had it and asked him to just answer the question and quit playing me. He abruptly said goodnight and went offline. I’ve been up all night. I wrote an apology text taking the blame as I always do… he read but got the first time EVER, did not respond. I called and it went to voicemail! Never had that happen before! ??

Hi! Just trying to learn more about approaching a relationship with someone who is a 30+ year paraplegic.