Dating Paraplegic Girls
This is the story of how I met Jeff and our first date together. Dating paraplegic girls isn’t for everyone. Jeff doesn’t seem to mind dating paraplegic girls or that I’m handicapped. We have really hit it off. I still can’t believe, if I wasn’t running late for work that day, we may have never met. Being in a rush, I decided to go in my wheelchair, without the leg braces I usually wear. I am a paraplegic, paralyzed from just above my waist down to my feet. I have been a paraplegic since I was a little girl. I’ve really never known anything different.
My legs are very thin and flaccid, but I still think of myself as attractive, even sexy. I’ve have long flowing hair over a pretty face and large breasts over a tiny waist. My ample breasts are my best feature so I like to show them off a little with a tight blouse. Most men say I’m attractive but are not interested in dating paraplegic girls or dating wheelchair girls in general. I guess it’s just hard for some men to commit to a relationship with a handicapped girl. Most of the reasons I have been given for not dating paraplegic girls are based on false beliefs.
Wheelchair Friendly Workplace
I work in a big wheelchair friendly office building where I have to go from room to room a lot. About a year ago I started wearing long leg braces and using crutches to maneuver around the building. It’s much easier than getting a wheelchair through crowded hallways and elevators. The braces start at the tops of my thighs and go down to knee locks so I can bend my legs if I’m sitting. From there they go down to my ankles where I can attach any number of shoes I like to wear.
I have all kinds of shoes from athletic shoes to sandals for the summer. My favorites though are the high heels I wear at work. I have all kinds, mostly around three inch. My right leg is also a little shorter than my left one, another part of my disability. My right leg just stopped growing when I was about 13 and my left leg continued to grow until I was about 17. It’s really not that much difference, but to make up for it most of my shoes have a built-up sole on the right side, and are one size smaller since that foot is smaller.
Why Use a Wheelchair Leg Braces and Crutches
I’ve learned to use my leg braces pretty well and walk with a swing through gait. That means I put both forearm crutches out in front of me and swing both legs through the middle. Since I don’t have any control of my waist or legs my shorter right leg kind of swings first and my left drags the floor just a little as it swings through. Wearing leg braces under slacks is difficult. I am used to people staring at my legs as I am almost always in a skirt or dress. Once it would have made me uncomfortable. Now I even like to show the leg braces off a little. Sometimes my skirts barely cover the thigh straps on the tops of my braces.
I’ve become used to wearing pantyhose too which I never used to do. Without the pantyhose, the pads on the braces rub my legs too much. But that day I was just in my wheelchair wearing a little skirt just above my knees. The blouse was a little on the tight side with pantyhose and my two inch platform style heels. Getting around in my leg braces on crutches is slow and I’ve fallen many times. My wheelchair is safer and faster but I cannot stand up to reach things without the leg braces. So I mostly use both wheelchair and leg braces together. Guys into dating paraplegic girls are often into stockings and pantyhose as well.
Meeting Paraplegic Girls
When I use my wheelchair I don’t need a pair of shoes with a build-up. There’s no reason to and it’s hardly noticeable. The footrests on my chair are in the middle and close together. The right footrest plate is just a little higher to make up the difference in my leg length. I was on the way to the file room when I took a corner too fast and actually ran into this very handsome man in a suit. I was so embarrassed! Not so much because I ran into him, but when I did, my right foot actually came off the footrest, knocking my shoe off.
Not having any feeling in my legs or feet I didn’t know my shoe was off until I noticed the man kept looking down. I looked too and could see the pink polish on my toenails through my tan pantyhose. Now most everyone has seen my legs of course, but I realized at that moment no one at work has ever seen my bare feet. They are so limp and thin. I was really was embarrassed. This man had to see me pick my leg up with my hands and get my foot back on the footrest of the wheelchair.
I’ve noticed before that people like to stare. Especially men dating paraplegic girls. They like to see how a handicapped girl moves her legs with her hands getting out of a car, and things like that. Sometimes, when I know I have an audience, I put on a little show. I struggle a little more than I really have to. Not this time. After the man noticed my red face, he quickly looked away, fumbling around reaching for my shoe. He handed the shoe to me awkwardly. He looked so cute now blushing just as much as I was. I thanked him and pulled my leg up by lifting under one knee. This makes my foot point down. I hooked my toes with the shoe and pulled it onto the heel of my foot. He introduced himself as Jeff. We both made our apologies and started talking about where we were going, what our jobs were, who we knew and things like that.
Somehow we got on the subject of baseball. Jeff asked me if would like to watch the game that night with him at a bar a few blocks from the office. I really didn’t know what to say at first. I would love to go on a date with this handsome, polite man. But I get so nervous on first dates. I’m also very cautious of guys only interested in dating paraplegic girls. Being in a wheelchair we are a bit more vulnerable. I always feel like my disability is just hanging out there. Like, I know men new to dating paraplegic girls, want to ask me about my disability. But if I start offering information about my disability, or ask them about dating paraplegic girls, they seem to get uncomfortable. So I took a chance and just said yes. That I would like to see him after work. We made a meeting place and parted ways for the afternoon.
I am having a very hard time of going from one end of the desirable scale to the other virtually overnight. My ego is shot to bits as I am constantly passed over. Imagine having someone hounding you to get together but they have failed to read the profile. When they finally learn I am in a wheelchair they suddenly do a fast reverse as they run for the hills. The reality of the situation is I am still able to do most everything I did before. I downhill ski, enjoy my water access only cottage, I drive my car, I work. I still crave all the emotional and physical needs we all want. – Little Lady 57, on dating paraplegic girls.
Dating Paraplegic Girls Vulnerable to Insecurities
That evening, we met as expected and walked, well I wheeled, down to the bar for a few drinks. Nothing serious just good conversation and all to soon I was home. It wasn’t even dark! Walking me to my car I couldn’t help but think he didn’t like me. My disability was a turn-off. Oh well, just another guy not interested in dating paraplegic girls I thought. I tried to push all my insecurities to the back of my mind. Just then, he asked me how I came to be in a wheelchair. Jeff confided that he had noticed me around the office but only knew me as, “the girl who wears leg braces.” I was greatly relieved when he told me he thought I was sexy. He had wanted to approach me many times but was too shy to talk. He said he knew nothing about dating paraplegic girls.
Back at my car Jeff offered to help me get in. Of course I told him I could manage as I did it every day. We made plans for dinner the next evening. He pecked me on the cheek and walked away to where his car was parked. I slid my butt into the seat of my Volvo and put my legs in one at a time. My car has hand controls and a wheelchair lift that keeps the chair over the roof. I don’t have to get the wheelchair into the car after I get in it.
Intensions Dating Paraplegic Girls
Our dinner date the next evening couldn’t come fast enough. He dropped by my office around lunch on his way to a meeting to say hi and to make sure he was still picking me up at 7:30. That day I was in my wheelchair wearing my leg braces as usual. I couldn’t help but notice his glancing eyes when he came in my office. I was wearing a longer skirt, around mid-calf, so he could only see a little of my braces and my black three inch high heels. I was still curious about his exact intension dating paraplegic girls.
Jeff asked if I would be “walking or riding” that night (meaning was I going to be using my braces or wheelchair). We shared a laugh at his cleverness and I asked which would he prefer. He told me he was interested in seeing me use my leg braces. Admitting he had no experience dating paraplegic girls. He had never been out with a disabled woman before, only regular girls. That was exactly what I needed to hear. I immediately thought, I have just the outfit for you handsome. Again feeling aroused at the thought of him wanting to see me. Before I got to wet I eagerly agreed to use the leg braces and he went on to his meeting.
Shower and Dressing Handicapped Style
That evening when I arrived home I bathed myself in the shower. I have a special shower chair just for bathing. Most mobility handicapped folks use one. It stays in the shower. I transfer from my wheelchair into it and back out again. Sitting on just a towel, naked in my wheelchair, I dried my hair and my upper body. Then I pulled each leg up to my lap and dried them off. I put on some makeup and teased my hair then went to dress. First I needed just the right bra. A sexy bustier to push my breasts up would work. Skimpy and lingerie like enough to be inviting. If Jeff proves okay with dating paraplegic girls, he would be getting to see a whole lot more of me, than on our first date.
I went with a silky, dark purple bra with black lace over most of the cup. The mirror over my dresser told me with a close look you could actually see my nipples through the lace. My nipples hardened as my thoughts drifted off to my date seeing me in my delicate bra. I smiled taking panties that matched the bra and a pair of tan pantyhose from my dresser and wheeled to my bed. Shifted my butt to the bed and pulled my legs up behind me. One foot at a time through the panties and up my legs got them to the tops of my thighs. I bunched up the waistband and with a quick bum hop motion slid my bottom into my panties.
The pantyhose were next. Still sitting up with my lifeless paralyzed legs out in front of me, I pulled one leg up to my chest. Bunching up one leg of the hose, I worked it over my small foot and over my ankle. By letting my leg fall back into place, I pulled the nylon up along my leg to around my knee, and repeated the process with the other leg. I straightened the hose around my feet and calves, making it a little tighter. Then I worked the hose up my legs and to my thighs just like the panties. A tip for any guys dating paraplegic girls. We go to a lot of trouble to look nice for you, be sure to compliment us.
With the pantyhose, I have to lay back on the bed and kind of lift my bottom as I pull the hose to my waist. I’ve known other paraplegics my whole life, and just about all of them find it easier to wear thigh-high hose, so they only have to worry about dressing one leg at a time. My problem is my legs are so thin around my thighs. Those type of hose would actually end up sliding down my legs before I made it to my car. My legs just aren’t big enough to hold them up, so the full pantyhose are my only choice.
I rolled over to the side of the bed and picked up both leg braces, laying them on the bed beside my legs. Using one hand, I lifted my leg from just above my ankle. I could feel the pantyhose under my hand. I wondered what it felt like for a woman that could feel her legs. Wonder what it would feel like to have your legs wrapped in pantyhose. Feeling them rub against each other under your skirt, or what pantyhose felt like over your feet. I guess I’ll never know. I just enjoy the feeling that comes from my hand. I took my other hand and laid the leg brace under my leg. Where I could place my leg in the shiny steel cradle of the brace. The strap under my knee gets tightened first, then above my knee, then my thigh strap.
I do the same with my right leg, lifting the leg into the brace and fastening the straps tightly on my legs. I still can’t walk with the braces yet because I don’t keep any shoes attached to the braces. I unlock the knees so my legs will bend and slide myself back to my waiting wheelchair. I can lift my legs now using my hands on the braces, so I lift them one at a time into the footrests of the chair and go to my shoes. The dress I’ll be wearing is a cute one piece black one, so my black pumps would probably look best. I place the shoes in my lap, now it’s back to the bed. Once in the bed, knees still unlocked, I pull each leg up so I can reach my foot, still naked in its nylon.
My shoes have to be tight to support my weight with the braces so it’s a little hard getting them on. Putting a high heel shoe onto a foot that you can’t stiffen is not an easy task. So with a little work I get the shoes onto my feet and attach them to the braces. Now lowering my legs to the floor, I lock the leg braces straight and reach for my crutches. Standing, slowly at first to keep my balance, I begin to take my first swinging step to my closet. I’ve been using these leg braces for a year now, and I still can’t believe how stiff they keep my paralyzed legs.
After spending 28 years not being able to walk, sometimes I can’t actually believe it’s my legs I’m standing on. Showered and dressed in my bra pantyhose and leg braces, I can stand to wiggle into that tight black dress. I know it will make Jeff’s eyes pop! I can stand without crutches as long as I have something to balance myself on. I just can’t take any steps without crutches. So I balance against the dresser and lean the crutches against the bed. I pull the dress over my head and around my body, smoothing out the soft fabric and letting it fall just above my knees.
There’s a slit in the side that almost exposes the very top of my braces, and probably will once I sit down somewhere. After a few looks in the mirror I decided I was ready for the evening date and crutched it back to my wheelchair. I told you dating paraplegic girls go to a lot of trouble.
Pre Disability Dating Nerves
I use the wheelchair at home even if I’m wearing the braces. It’s just easier and it keeps my hands free. Since the one footrest is a little higher for my shorter leg, and I was now wearing my braces with the built up shoe on that foot, my right leg sits up higher than my left. I like to cross my right leg over my left, which I did of course by picking the right leg up and pulling it over the left. I took notice of the slit in my dress when I did that to see just how much of my leg was exposed. I could see to just under the thigh strap of my brace, perfect I grinned. It should be just enough to get Jeff wanting to see more. I was very keen to make his first time dating paraplegic girls enjoyable.
I sat staring at my disabled legs in braces wondering how the events of the evening would go. I heard the knock at my door I had been waiting on. I turned my wheelchair and headed for the door. When I got to the door, I invited Jeff in, the door was open. He entered looking great and holding flowers. He immediately complimented me on my choice of dress. It’s like this guy swallowed the book on dating paraplegic girls.
I retreated to the kitchen with the flowers for a vase as he sat down in the living room. We made typical small talk about work that day while I tended to the flowers. Then I went to the bedroom for my crutches and returned to Jeff swinging my legs a little slower than usual, and dragging that left leg a little more than usual. I had already decided that I wanted to put on a good show for Jeff. He would see just how crippled I really am, a kind of acid test to sort the men from the boys.
With my thin legs wrapped in the nylons and leg braces, and my sexiest black pumps Jeff couldn’t take his eyes off my legs. I could feel his eyes burning on me as I descended the ramp off my front porch and to his car where he held the door open. I ask him to take my crutches for me, which of course he did, and I transferred myself down into the car seat, still stiff-legged. I showed him how the leg brace knee locks work (in case he wanted to know for later). I pulled both legs in at once to keep my dress from opening up for the world to see. Jeff stowed the crutches and wheelchair and off we went.
Sexy Handicapped Women and Public Reactions
The valet at the restaurant couldn’t believe his eyes when he opened the car door. The common public reaction to seeing a sexy handicapped girl is one of confusion. Many have trouble connecting the two, sexy and handicapped. They often look my date up and down for signs of a disability. Like they think you have to be disabled to be dating paraplegic girls.
I swung my braced legs out and let the knee locks snap into place. Jeff quickly came around with my crutches and helped me to my feet. Jeff sternly pointed out to the valet how the wheelchair ramp was blocked with a sign that had fallen from the building. I told them I could manage the four steps up to the entrance. I was actually secretly excited that Jeff would get to see me conquer the steps.
I told Jeff I needed him to hold one of my crutches and stand behind me in case I slipped. With my left crutch on the first step, and my right hand on the handrail, I pushed against the crutch and let my legs drag behind me up onto the step. My right leg came first as usual, and then my left. I had to twist my body a little to get my left foot over the step. I could then stand to move my crutch to the second step. I took the steps slowly, giving Jeff plenty of time to see the braces through the slit in my skirt and enjoy my struggling up the steps. I made it to the door fine, where the doorman held the door for us both.
A True Gentleman Dating Paraplegic Girls
Dinner was perfect, with a little wine Jeff seemed to be enjoying his first experience dating paraplegic girls. Wine gets people talking and it certainly did its trick on us. Jeff confided that he had never known my legs were different lengths and was interested in the thick sole on my right shoe. I explained how my shoes were of different sizes due to my right foot being smaller. He told me how gracefully I moved in the leg braces, and how beautiful he thought I was. This one is a keeper I thought to myself. Despite never dating paraplegic girls before Jeff remained a true gentleman sensitive to my dsability. I hadn’t felt so safe and comfortable to just be me in a long time. When it comes to dating paraplegic wheelchair girls, and dating women with a disability, being called special is very different from being made feel truly special. A true gentleman knows the difference.
One time I shifted under the table and moved my leg out just far enough for him to feel my brace against his leg. I saw his cheeks blush and gave him a little smile. I quietly reassured him that I was okay with him touching the braces and that I admired him very much. I even pushed my chair in a little where the pad on the knee was rubbing the inside of his thigh. We sat like this through dinner and through our second bottle of wine by the time the check came. Jeff kept his hand around my waist as we made our way outside and down those steps to the car. Jeff took my crutches without my asking and I pulled my legs into the car.
Disability Parking and No Stopping Short
We leaned into each other on the ride back to my house. Jeff’s hand wandered over to my thigh where he politely asked, “May I?” His hand rubbed gently, first on my dress, then around through the slit and between the upright parts of my brace. His strong warm hand paused when he softy touched the skin of my silky smooth thigh making me gasp. I couldn’t exactly feel his hand, but knowing it was there gave me chills, and greatly aroused me. Even though I’m paralyzed, I can still function sexually, and feel an orgasm. The physical part is a little hard, since I can’t really move my waist or legs, but the feeling is there all the same.
When we got home, I invited him in and got out of the car where he was waiting with my crutches. I crutched up to the door, again with his hand on my waist only it was a little lower this time. We went in and I started making coffee, crutching with my braced legs around the kitchen. I told him I was going to take my braces off so we could get comfortable on the couch when he said something that shocked me. He ask me if he could help take my leg braces off. I could see that he was beginning to get aroused and thought I could have lots of fun with this, as I was aroused too. So I said he could and swung my legs through my crutches over to the couch.
I thought about getting my wheelchair first so I wouldn’t be totally helpless after my braces were off but then thought better or it. Jeff had gotten this far, perhaps he would like carrying me to my bedroom. I sat on the couch with my legs straight out in front of me with feet resting on the floor. I instructed Jeff to move my skirt to the side and unlock my knees so my legs would bend in. He released the locks and pulled the lower parts of my legs in toward the couch. He was fast becoming an expert at dating paraplegic girls.
I suggested, “I’d like to lay back if you could pull my legs to the couch for me.” With a nod I reclined and he pulled my legs to the couch and up into his lap. He did them together so as not to spread. My skirt rode up anyway past the tops of the braces and revealing the darker part of my pantyhose. He said sorry and pulled my skirt back over my legs. I told him it was okay. I kind of knew it would happen and didn’t mind one bit.
I have to say I’ve never had a man touch me like this and help me with my leg braces. I was getting extremely turned on by watching his hands on my thin flaccid legs and touching my braces. I asked if he would mind taking the upright part of the leg braces off of the shoes. Then slide my shoes off of my feet. I bit on my bottom lip as he did so eagerly but gently.
I watched him slowly ease my pumps off revealing my left foot then my smaller right foot. He took a minute to study the difference in my feet. All the things I thought were a drawback in dating paraplegic girls. My disability, spinal cord injury, the wheelchair crutches and leg braces, my flaccid legs and crippled feet. To Jeff these things are a bonus that regular girls dont come with. He noted the nail polish on my toes and rubbed my feet for a few minutes. I could tell he liked the feeling of my feet in the pantyhose.
He began undoing the straps on my calf and leaned in just far enough to kiss me when he reached up my skirt for the thigh band. One hand was caressing my leg as the other took the thigh band apart, the whole time kissing me more and more intently. After the leg brace was loose around my leg he picked my leg up letting the foot dangle. Placing the brace on the floor he moved in closer gently pushing my shoulder. I realized I was awfully tensed up and relaxed back on the couch.
He has the most beautiful smile. He lay on top of me with his hands around my face. Caressing my waist and my legs he slowly began coming closer to my breasts. I wanted him to touch my breasts and lick my nipples so badly I could hardly stand it. Since my right hand was already pulling his shirt from his pants, I used my left to guide his hands into my blouse.
Here I was on the couch, one leg brace on and one off, still pretty much dressed, under this man I couldn’t wait to get to my bedroom. My blouse was off and on the floor, sexy bra not far behind. My nipples stood erect with pleasure. I had his shirt off admiring is shoulders and chest. The bulge in his pants told me he was erect with pleasure as well. He pulled away just long enough to take my other brace from my leg. My skirt bunched up around my waist revealing both thin limp legs in tan pantyhose.
I now felt Jeff was very comfotable with dating paraplegic girls. I whispered to him to carry me down the hall to the bed, and with much pleasure he did just that. One hand around my waist, the other under my knees letting my legs fall where they wanted, he carried me down the hall to my bedroom. He moved my wheelchair with his leg so he could place me on the bed, then fell on top of me. He pulled my skirt off first, sliding it slowly down my nylon-clad legs and letting is slip under my feet and off to the floor. We rolled in the bed a little longer, me just in my hose and panties underneath now, which were becoming more wet with every minute.
Paralyzed Legs Don’t Disable Lovers
Paralyzed and lusting heavily my lover took control. His willingness to dating paraplegic girls was about to pay off. We were ready to shift up a gear to sex with paraplegic girls. He rolled me over wrapping my legs around his waist where I would be comfortable. I tugged his belt off unfastened the front of his bulging pants and pulled him hard against my naked breasts. He was huge now fully erect. I slid his pants and shorts off his waist. He pulled and kicked them the rest of the way off and began pulling at the waist of my pantyhose.
He slid my pantyhose down both legs at once thin and pale they are. As he was sliding my feet out of the nylons I was already pulling my panties down, eager for him to enter me. He was on top and had spread my legs wide at first, pulling them together around him as he came in at me. He was lunging harder and harder. It wasn’t long sex but I’ve never had better. We moved together in furious rhythm. Reaching orgasm at the same time both collapsing exhausted.
We lay laughing together for a long time talking about the act we had so passionately committed. Jeff went to the bathroom to wash off. I waited for him to finish and had him to bring me a towel for my wheelchair. I put the towel in the chair and slid over into it. My paralyzed legs followed. Wrapping the towel around my midsection I put my feet in their rests. Naked except for the towel, I too washed off and returned to bed where we both slept. Knowing soon we both would have to prepare for work.
Disability Lovers Finding New Legs
This morning was almost as exciting as last night. I got to do something I’ve never done before. Jeff had a change of clothes in his car which he got while I was bathing. While he showered I went about getting ready as usual. I chose my outfit for the day: Red skirt and black top, jet-black pantyhose, and the same black pumps from the night before. I retrieved my braces and heels from the front room using my wheelchair. As I was returning to the bedroom Jeff came in. His hair wet and oh so sexy fresh from the shower. He took my leg braces and put them on the bed for me, asking if he could put them on. Wow I thought, of course I didn’t mind, I was excited by the idea. I had to keep reminding myself Jeff was actually new to dating paraplegic girls. I had to take things slowly.
I needed to get my panties and pantyhose on as I was still naked except for the towel. He picked me up from the wheelchair like the night before and laid me on the bed. He actually picked up the clothes I laid out and began dressing me! First the panties which he slid one foot at a time through them and pulled them up my legs. He stopped me when I tried to help and I couldn’t help but smile. I laid back, and let him lift my bottom while his free hand pulled the panties around my waist. He took the black pantyhose, and lifting one foot at a time, pulled each stocking onto my feet and legs, and up to my thighs where he had to lift my bottom again.
He smoothed my legs out and picked up the brace for my left leg. He placed my thin leg into its brace and fastened the straps in reverse order from the night before. Lifting my foot a little, he wiggled it into the high heel pump and attached it to the brace. Then he ask me if I could walk using only one leg brace. Well I didn’t know if I could or not as I had never tried. Thinking it might turn him on to see me try I wanted to see if I could. My man would there to catch me if I couldn’t.
Jeff retrieved my crutches from the front room and I lowered my leg onto the floor. The knee clicked into its locked position. I balanced on the one stiff leg at first. Noticing with the three inch heel, my shorter right leg dangled about five inches above the floor. So I extended the crutches, and pulled my body forward letting my right leg swing freely. Pulling my left behind it dragged a little more than before on the floor. My firm naked breasts jiggled as I struggled around the bedroom. Dating paraplegic girls does have its perks. My bouncing boobs were two of them.
I could actually do this I thought. Walking on one brace only if I wanted, leaving my shorter leg hanging. I got Jeff to take another one of my high heels without the brace attachment made into it and slide it over my right foot. This almost made up the difference to the floor. Making the toe of the shoe point downward and barely touching the floor. I crutched around for a few minutes. Leaning on my one stiff braced leg and dragging the other limp leg behind. I let the toe of the pump slide on the floor.
Like the night before I could see Jeff becoming aroused at the sight of my frail paralyzed legs. I realized he was attracted not only to me but my disability as well. I became excited at the idea. It was nice to know I didn’t have to try and be like any other woman he had been with. I could be comfortable about my handicap knowing Jeff liked dating paraplegic girls. He was more than okay with my spinal cord injury. He liked my wheelchair, leg braces, crutches and my disability.
After crutching around a bit I went back to the bed and pulled myself bottom first onto it. I pulled my right leg to my chest and took off the smaller pump revealing my foot in only the pantyhose. I took the other leg brace and laid it under my leg. Jeff helped me with the straps and put my other pump on. The one with the build-up on the bottom and attached it to the brace. He also helped me on with my skirt while I put my bra and blouse on.
Jeff thoroughly enjoyed his first time dating paraplegic girls. I’m so glad it was with me! We didn’t bother asking about taking separate cars to work. He drove and I’m sure after work today he’ll drive me home. We’ll spend another exciting night together as disability lovers. Maybe tonight I’ll show him how I sometimes drag myself from room to room in the house. Let him see me pull my thin lifeless legs around without the braces crutches or the wheelchair. Dating paraplegic girls does require a little patience and understanding. And with that, I wish you all the happiness and love in dating paraplegic girls, that I have come to find.
Kristi Eden
Resources
- Dating a Paraplegic: http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts4094222.aspx
- Dating Disabled: http://www.datingdisabled.net
- Dating Paraplegic Girls: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110612052155AAB2tao
- Disabled Passions: http://www.disabledpassions.com/groups/Paraplegic.html
I just got in an accident about a year ago and I gotta say dating has been so hard…but I just wanna say I absolutely adore your story – please friend me on Facebook (removed) – and I write as well. Actually, I’m writing a book too, but I’d love to chat about a few things I am having trouble with. I don’t really know anyone or have many people to talk to about this issue. I’d be honored if you didn’t mind. Anyways, have a great day :)
Hi Glen, for members and visitors security we do not allow the posting of personal contact info on publically visible areas of our website. Our forum is a safe place to ask questions and talk to people about issues. Feel free to join, introduce yourself and ask questions there.
There are plenty of men who would date a handicapped lady. Eventually she dumped me. :( Now she’s getting hit on by other guys.
wow!
I’m 18 and have a muscle disease which causes me to be in a wheelchair. I’ve been wanting to find someone who looks past my disability but have been unsuccessful. I have regained hope after reading this that not all guys are shallow. Thanks :)
I have always wondered what people went through when it came to paraplegic and well…non lol would date. I would like to hear accounts of male paraplegics dating abled women.
Hello. My boyfriend was in an accident two months ago and is a T6 complete. This story was really amazing for me to read. Thanks for the insperational story!
Kc, could you tell me how you coped with it and by T6 complete, what do you mean? Would love to hear more about this
Aaron, from what I understand, dont trust my word for it, but by complete I have been told that his spinal cord was completley severed with no voluntry motor function past the injury site. But I am only starting to fully understand what it means. How have i coped with it? At the moment he is still going through PT in the hospital, the real challenge will be when he gets back home and into an every-day routine. What I try and do is stay as positive and optimistic as possible. He is the most amazing man I have ever met and his accident would never change how he makes me feel. I am able to get through day-by-day but I have to keep in mind that his struggles are going to exceed my own and I am going to stick by him.
That’s a great mindset for anyone, thankyou.
I think for my case, I was born a paraplegic. So it’s all I know. And have simply grown up doing things a different way. My challenge has now been to hopefully meet someone who will accept me for who i am as a person. And look past my physical disability.
Aaron, I understand the challenge for you; but the biggest advice i could give is to be comfortable with yourself and who you are and others around you will see all the amazing qualities that you have to offer. For me personally, my boyfriends personality and characeristics are what I love. Who you are as a person is way more important in the grand scheme of things and a good woman/man would be able to recognize that above a person’s ableness.
I truly believe the chair actually helps people get noticed more. People often assume that others view the chair 100% negative but thats bull from things I have experienced. I have DMD its a common type of dystrophy males get, but I have beat the odds to become the man I am. Ive dated a woman without a disability before and had a lot of female interest and attention. Its your attitude and courage (if you are shy) that gets you noticed.
I am married to a wonderful lady who is a polio survivor and who wears legbraces.She is smart, highly intellectual, loving and compassionate, and to me she is the world.She has accomplished many things in her life in spite of incredible hardships, andwhen I look at all of these things and the bravery with which she goes through her life my love for her and my admiration for her goes through the roof.Her disability is not in the least a problem as far as I am concerned, and to me she is the the most beautiful sexiest and most desirable woman in the world.Her physical challenges are part of who she is, and she would not be the same incredible person without having had to overcome so many challenges in her life.I can only talk for myself but am sure that a physical disability is not a problem where real love is concerned.A man is marrying the person and the intellect and nothing can overcome these things.
Thank you Kristi for that very beautiful and inspirational story. It seems that “your guy” was, indeed, seeing you for yourself, not as someone who was limited by a wheelchair, braces, and crutches.
Cruise4848. You are a perfect pair. Your adoration for your wife and her being able to overcome so many challenges, proves you are a very great guy, and an awesome husband.
Thank you Science of Mind for your very kind comments.My wife does much to lead by example in helping other disabled ladies to overcome shyness and other problems and go out and face the world with new strength.She is a psychologist by training which gives her the tools to enable her to know how to talk to people.The fact that she wears skirts and is not shy to show her braces gives conviction to her words, and advice coming from someone who is also disabled helps others to realise that everything is possible.My wife grew up in dire poverty and was raised by her grand parents who could not afford a wheelchair for her so she used to slide on the floor on a pillow to get about.One cannot imagine how degrading this must have been for a young girl (she got polio at age 18 months)She only walked for the first time when she was in her 20,s and did all of her schooling and university on scholarships.Her story is incredible and good material for a movie, I am so proud of her.I have written a book about her.One of the things which may be of encouragement to the readers is the fact that after she graduated from university she gave a year of her life to living in a tiny villiage in the jungles of Northern Colombia, where with the help of local people she built a school, drilled and built a water well, got funding from different sources for schoool supplies and trained local people to become teachers so that when she left they would be able to keep the school going.She used to have to catch her own fish to eat and developed her swimming skills in the process. To her nothing is impossible and the sky is the limit.
Hi – my name is Pam. I’m in a wheelchair but am not a paraplegic. I was born with cerebral palsy and didn’t walk until I was the age of 4. I walked for 9 years of my life. Ever since the hip surgery, I was not able to walk on my own. I walked with canadian crutches for many year in my parents home. When I moved out on my own, I was pretty much in the chair. It was easier. Things were more accessible to me. Living up north in Ft, Wayne Indiana was getting to be very challenging. A friend from where I worked asked me to share expenses on a road trip to Orlando, Fl. It was at the point the LORD was letting me know to move to warmer climate. It was a big scary step leaving my family. Life is so much easier here. Being in a wheelchair and not that mobile, I am a heavy woman. People say that I’m pretty. Sometimes I feel pretty but most the time I don’t. I’ve never had a boyfriend, or I should say a descent boyfriend. The relationship I was in I learned what I couldn’t do with a man. I have learned there is many ways to love and so much that I could give to love a man, if that someone could love me unconditionally. It is a lonely life that I have. I am blessed though that I have Jesus Christ and one day HE will lead me to someone that will love me. I hope this inspired someone. Lords Blessing to anyone who reads this.
Hi Pam, I read your comment with interest.I hope that you dont mind if I give you some suggestions which I have found have helped me in my life.It seems to me that all of us on this planet are given different challenges in our lives.Some are physical, some are emotional etc but in the end these are there to test us and in overcoming them they make us stronger.I am also a firm believer that we are all guided in our lives, and things happen for a reason.In your case the CP is a great challenge for you to live with and overcome, just like the polio is my wife’s big challenge.What she has done is to accept the ravages of polio as her starting point in life, and has tried to build from there.She has tried to think beyond this and by doing this she has elevated herself by study and getting very involved in helping other disabled people who are worse off than she is.This has also given her the realisation that in comparison with others she is very lucky, and this has encouraged her very much in her life.It seems also that there are many “Right” people in this world for each of us, and I am sure that even without making a conscious effort to find the right man for you the right man will find you when the time is right for this to happen.Call this destiny or God’s will but whichever way you look at it there are stories of people meeting each other in the most extraordinary of circumstances, without them even trying to find each other.So dont despair, go on with your life, and you will see that the right person will come along when this is meant to happen.
I am a para, My wife crossed over in 2001 and she was a wonderful woman. She stood by me when I was shot, went through PT, and never thought of me as disabled. I am very active, I love to travel, I live alone and love life. God has blessed me in so many ways I can only be happy. I would like to meet a girl para. It gets lonely living alone. I have a lot of friends but I want that someone special in my life. Everything works if you get my drift. My legs are too weak for me to walk so I use a power chair. I have tried so many dating sites and came up empty. I did date a para once and it was so good to be with someone who got me, and I got her to. It was great and would have grown into something more but I moved and as they say life must go on. I am a prankster and love life. I never meet a stranger.
I’ve been paralyzed 22 years. I’ve never had an issue dating … I’m in a sports wheelchair so I think it looks less intrusive then hospital ones or bulky ones. I’m small framed and besides thin legs from years of not walking don’t have anything else that sticks out as being disabled. For years people thought I had a broken leg or it wasn’t perminant. I am getting married soon and actually have a daughter so dating, getting married, having kids shouldn’t seem odd! I’ve always had guys approach me and don’t think any have ever thought ” oh no way” . Sorry some of you have seen or dealt with that. I have male friends who are paralyzed and dating able bodied women and some married with kids so it’s not uncommon . Guess I should say I’m 26 and I’m also a t6 complete. A complete is a full break of the spinal cord. Some have an incomplete which isn’t a total sever of the spine .
I find the same Kat. My thin flaccid legs slight frame and splinted hands make obvious my spinal cord injury. 18 years a C5-6 incomplete quadriplegic in a “bulky” powerchair I’ve had little problem attracting women. I’m no Calvin Kline underwear model but I am clean confident and charismatic, intelligent and sassy, fun loving and positive. Most people see me not the wheelchair, as for those who don’t, it’s their loss.
i am a disabled person paralyses from lower part of body i live in wheelchair i always I’ve had problem attracting women.so at age of 47 still remain single
being in a wheelchair aint no fun but if you put your mind to it you can achieve anything considered, I too have a muscle disease classed as IHB2 its degenerative, but wont kill me, finding a woman is somewhat harder than what i am used to but one must try persevere and fingers crossed it may happen…
Iam a 26 year old male.. I been paralized since 22 . I have music videos my name is Filth Rich. But I can say iam blessed and handsome. I have no issue geting woman. I pray a lot. Maybe not enough. So in our case. Convudence and being well groomed can help a lot. And persueing a lot. Proving can’t nothing stop you. Come on? Isn’t that sexy enough. I love a cocky person. I take baths. Drive and live and work on mY own. I recently got engaged. And im happy my only thing is my butt be sore I have a robot. So just know! Keep positive energy around you. And stay confidence. And do the same is a person with four legs :))
Hello =),
My name is Dina,,im 25 yrs old, i’ve had an accident about 5 years ago, im a T12 L1,,have been paraplegic using a wheelchair since, i do walk using the leg brace sometimes and have been doing pretty good..I had a question that is really worrying me at the moment. I am a virgin, and i will be getting married soon…I never actually had intercourse so i wouldn’t know how it normally feels. I just know i don’t have the skin sensation in the vaginal area. I can tell if there’s something but not the skin sensation at all..Would that affect my sex life in anyway? Is there anything that i should do to gain more sensation in that area?
Thanks for reading, let me know if you have an answser please..
Regards,
D
Hi Dina,
I’m c6-7 from spinal cancer, I have had a happy sexual life. No, I do not feel sensation either. Im married to the same woman for 17 years now. Go slow and use ky or other lubs. When I ejactulate orgasm you feel it in your brain and all over. Hope all goes well don’t worry enjoy…
I want to marry a woman who loves me for who I am not what I can give to them materially any single ladies
I live in the Philippines and I’m using a leg brace due to polio. I’m educated, I have my masters, I work and pay my bills, very independent and pretty much can go wherever I want to ( though a little slow ). What makes dating hard is the mentality of the people I’m usually associated with. I meet a lot of good looking men who thinks I’m good looking but will only have fun not wanting to go further. I meet smart educated guys who wants a girl they can show off and of course braced girls are not included. I meet average guys, who have nothing much to brag about but still thinks I’m way below them just because I limp. Is it the place where I live, the society I’m at, or there are just too many AB girl choice for these men where I am ( lols ). But I’m not giving up on love that easy specially reading this article. I just want to meet a man who I can level with. Hit me up if your him ;)
and by the way I’m in my 30’s never been married no kids, but hope to
Fantastic story, I have been dating an amazing woman, she is a paraplegic. More importantly, she is a vibrant, intelligent, independent and freaking sexy woman. The only issues have been my own, having never know, let alone dated a paraplegic. I had no idea when it came to physical contact….if I move her legs could I hurt her? I was completely clueless, but, between talking and testing……wow! We have been dating for a while now and things are fantastical. There is wonderful information on the Internet. Thank you to everyone for sharing stories and experiences. It’s funny how meeting the right person can change everything!! Kcco
Hi,
I had a brain tumor, but feel like I kind of fit in with this group.
I got sick at age 26, now I’m 43, I lived in St Louis, MO, now I live in PA with my parents. I walk using a cane, and have slight paralysis on my left side, funny, I used to play drums, can’t anymore. I am able to exercise, so I often go to the gym and ride a trike to kill time. Before this happened I was a very sociable guy, bar tended and had tons of friends, not now, lol, my parents live in a gated community, so I rarely socialize now! Not sure how to say this without sounding like a pervert, but I’d like to talk to a female, long story, haven’t been intimate in years, sorry if that sounds weird, but at least it’s honest!
I am from india, my girlfriend is physicaly chalangd but it never turnd hindres, in our love, she, s very beautiful n i love her very much. She have changed my entire life, each and every thing in my life, even i m al bcoz of her……. I realy love you sweetheart to being in my life……
N guys nodought “ONLY A GENTLEMAN CAN DATE A PARAPLEGIC GIRL”
Read all the story and the comments. You people are incredible. I am in communication with a person whom I believe is handicapped. With your incredible stories I am sure i am now able to connect with her appropriately. She has not yet advised me of her condition (which I only suspect) but if I am right , you have given me a huge step up. Thank you
Kristi Eden says in the story that her right leg is shorter, but the picture above clearly shows that the left leg is shorter.
Why is that?
That’s a very nice story! I got polio when I was 2years old. now I am 42 years old. I use brace on one leg. I sometimes use my power wheelchair if I go to the mall. I don’t see my disability as a barrier. I have a job, I drive nice cars. I am married with 6 beautiful kids. My wife is fabled woman, pretty. Before I got married, I was always dating beautiful women white, black, Asian etc…
So having a disability doesn’t mean you can’t date.
Being disabled myself I always have a rule of thumb when it comes to needing assistance with things. If I can turn the act of assistance it into a game, I ask my partner to help, but if it can’t turn it into a game, I ask a nurse.
In example getting help putting socks on usually results in a partner teasing or tickling my feet, having a laugh together. Bathroom related assistance is no game and thus a nurse aids there.
By not presuring a partner to help with non-fun tasks, a relationship stays healthy.
In 2005 I was involved a vehicle rollover, BUT I didn’t become paralyzed, I suffered a Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI). I was however in a wheelchair at first due to mines head injury, I was in a One-Arm drive wheelchair at first then to a walker and now I use a cane only.
Well enough about that life’s too short to talk about that crash. Life’s about moving forward no matter what life’s hand’s have dealt you. I believe in looking at the glass as half full rather than half empty cause I’m an optimist. But having incurred a Traumatic head injury one has always treated people as one would want to be treated himself hey. I’m new to this cause I’ve never even or ever posted an add even on a Dating site and being brain injured oneself feels just as special cause I’m on here looking to meet someone else with a Brain Injury cause were all amazing people just with more specialer needs due to what our spectacular world throws our way hey. Well Race isn’t important just you gotta have the personality and I hope I have your personality that your into to huh? I’m an easygoing outgoing fella who likes to be optimistic, I’m a white male 6’1 blue eyes 34 years old never married no children. I don’t smoke, drink alittle I like thee outdoors I fished and have hunted too. one doesn’t know how to describe oneself because I’ve never ever been on a dating site ever B-4 so I’m a new Bee I guess
oh please don’t think my E-mail # is crazy I wanted a # that myself and people wouldn’t forget, so pardon my number sign if your religious….
ORIGINALLY POSTED UNDER THE WRONG ARTICLE …
My wife (able-bodied at the time) and I met in college, started dating right away, and after her (our) Junior year, she contracted polio, and to make a long story short … she lost complete use of both legs (100% flail), and ended up with longleg braces (aka: “Warm Springs” braces). Life went on, and after we both graduated (it took her an extra semester), we got married and Lived Happily Ever After. It’s interesting that your story comes so close to our real world … my wife found your story on-line, showed it to me, and said, “Hey David, were they watching us?” The woman you described (portrayed) in your story sounds much more like a “Polio” (her term, not mine) than a person with a spinal cord injury. Seldom, if ever, do people with spinal cord injuries use longleg braces because it’s dificult-to-impossible for them to “swing through” like my wife does. Everything else in your story is just about spot-on (without going too deep into the details). We still chuckle when men (it’s always men) stare at her braced legs … in slacks, skirts, dresses or shorts. She has mentioned that she’s been told that there quite a few men who are attracted to women with disabilities, particularly women with braces. Who’d have known?
Interesting comment from David H, and he’s right about men staring at braced legs. I’ve used leg braces since I was a young girl (polio at 13), and for years I thought that boys (and then men) wouldn’t be interested in me, but all that changed a couple years after I graduated from college and started working at a bank here in Dallas. I had a couple dates, nothing special, but I realized that they weren’t botherd by my braces (and crutches). Eventaully I met the right guy, and after living together for two years, we got married. We live a “normal” life (whatever that is), and our sex life is wonderful. He helps me take off my braces, and it’s become part of our foreplay, just like when I take off his shirt. And, for you able-bodied women and mates), you’d be amazed (and probably jealous), at what a girl with polio and two completely flail (paralyzed) legs can do in bed. So, yes, a lot of men are interested in women with leg braces, but for me, there’s only one man who matters, and he loves me for who I am.
Hi,
My name is Tim and I have been in a wheelchair for over 14 years due to a very rare neuromuscular disease called Polymyositis. I have been hoping to find a woman who’s able to see past the chair for a very long time but had no success. I wish I could be as fortunate as Kristi and find a woman who can accept a disabled person like Jeff did. I have been through hell, been totally paralyzed (no movement at all), lived in a nursing home for 2 1/2 years, but after much therapy and time I am independent again. I have some leg movement but not strength but my upper body isn’t too bad. I do have weakness in my arms and the muscles in my torso are weak but I am doing remarkably well. After reading this story I am a little more hopeful I’ll find someone but still wonder if it’ll ever happen. I just don’t understand why so many people can’t see past the chair and see the person sitting in it. I’m sure everyone here will agree, we aren’t really any different than anyone else. We still have the same feelings, the same needs and desires in life. I am sure I’m not the only one who’s frustrated with how people treat us but what do we do? I feel so alone sometimes and just want the company of a nice woman who can accept me for me. I guess the only question is will it ever happen?
I’m glad to have found this story and hope things will change for me too.
Tim
Hey Pam,
I also live in Fort Wayne, south side, in the Waynedale area. I would really like to get to know you but don’t know how to communicate with you. I don’t know this site well so don’t know how to get you my info. If there is a way I would really like to get to meet you and at least have a friend.
Tim
That was a Beautiful Story ! Everyone is Beautiful . Just when you think you won’t have love or a lover , there they are . Be good to yourself and take care of yourself , Never feel down on love because All of us are Love .
When i was in my early 20s i dated a paraplegic girl for about 8 months.she was incontinent and wore diapers and plastic pants and i had to change her a few times.I felt embarrassed and wasnt sure if this was the right thing to do,even tho she asked me to change her.Has any other guys experienced this?
‘Don’t know if this site is still active (I just found it), Interesting (and mostly correct) comments, so I figured I’d throw in my experience(s). I was just another “average” teenage girl until the summer before I was going to leave for college, but that’s when my life changed … I was one of last people in the Midwest contract Polio. ‘Came on quick … fever (not too high), weakness, sleep (on & off for 3 or 4 days); and when I woke up and tried to stand up, my legs wouldn’t move … and haven’t moved (on their own) since. Hospitalization, therapy, wheel chair, “Warm Springs” leg braces (full KAFO) and lots more time learning to “walk” (“sitting” on the top rung of both braces and swinging my body forward. Eventually … college (pre-ADA days), dating (some just fine & some absolutely awful!); graduation, a job, on ‘n off dating and a fair number of “relationships”; found the right guy, married, have two kids, etc. ‘Sounds way too normal, doesn’t it? Well, our lives are as “normal” as can be … we ‘re older now, the kids are grown-up & gone; and we’re still crazy about each other. I still don’t mind people staring at my braces. I still like it when he helps me in & out of our car; he does his share around the house, and we still have a healthy sex life. I love it when we’re standing up and I put down my crutches (standard forearm aluminum crutches), loop my arms around his neck, and we kiss like college kids on the sorority house front porch (just so he doesn’t let me lose my balance); I still enjoy having him take off my braces (slowly, buckle-by-buckle, strap-by-strap); I love it when he carefully positions my legs to make love; and I can assure you that we do things that other couple can’t. Bottom Line: I’m not sure I’d know what to do if I were “blessed” (?) with a new pair of legs that “worked”. My advice to women with disabilities … forget about what you can’t do and focus on what you can do. You’ll be pleasantly surprised.
‘Sounds like Katie and her husband have got it all figured out … good for them; and I hope that more people read her post. She and I are similar … polio “survivors” (I don’t like that word); totally flaccid legs (but no other residuals), brace-wearers for life, and comfortable (I hope she is) with the fact many people can’t stop themselves from staring at my legs … my braces, specially when I wear a dress, skirt or shorts. Sometimes (more often than not), it leads to very reasonable questions … “Are you a paraplegic?” NO. “Will you be able to walk?” NO, NOT REALLY . “Can you walk without those things?” NO. “Can you stand up?” (when I’m in my chair) YES, WITH CRUTCHES. “Have you always had them?” (the braces) NO. And then there are people who ask really dumb (and sometimes) rude questions. Personal question that if you’re reading this post, you’ll probably understand. When I first met my husband, I was sitting in a restaurant (bar) booth with my legs under the table (and my crutches out of sight), and we worked our way through “several” drinks before my friends said that it was time to hit the road. Time to stand up and see what happens (I was worried). To make a long story short, he asked for my number, and three years later we got married. I “guess” that the braces didn’t matter then, and they don’t matter now (and, with a little help & TLC, they come off quite easily.
‘Love this column … different people (mostly women) … very similar experiences. Maybe there should be a sub-category dealing with the effects (“residuals”) of polio … primarily the loss of use of legs (the “Braces & Crutches” club”). I “joined the club” when I was 12 … classic polio story: healthy, sick, paralyzed legs, despair, acceptance, therapy, longlegs bilateral braces (aka: Warm Springs braces – upper thigh down into my shoes’ channels. ‘Made it through high school with the expected hurdles … school bus with no lift, 3-story building, not enough time between classes, etc. ‘Not a lot of dating until my senior year, but things picked up (I guess guys finally figured out that I “didn’t bite”. ‘Couple boyfriends, and a “crash course” in physical contact … holding hands (not easy when I was holding myself up with my forearm crutches), hugging, kissing and the ever-popular “Feeling Up”… that was nice! I hit the first roadblock there … boys (particularly my “special” boyfriend) were afraid to touch my legs … touch my braces. I finally had to take my boyfriend’s hand and slide it ever so gently down from my waist, under my skirt, up to & over the padded bar at the top of my left brace and onto my thigh, my very, very thin thigh. That’s all it took … we were on our way. ‘Only one (semi-dumb) question – “Can you feel my hand?” Yes, I answered, “I can wherever you touch me”, and he did … I loved it. Normal relations from then-on, but (keep in mind this was in the Sixties), we never “consumated” our relationship. College was easier (except for the long walks between buildings), and the boys were more experienced (but not with dealing with Polios & braces). I wonder how other women dealt with sexual relations in college and beyond. Usually most guys were tentative, and needed a little help, but I didn’t lack for pleasure. Only a couple bad experiences … a blind-date with a guy who hadn’t been “warned” that I was different, and couldn’t stop looking down at my braces. Another time, I was sitting with some of my sorority sisters in corner booth at a campus bar, a couple guys joined us, we “coupled-up” and my guy eventually asked me if I wanted to dance. “Sure, but I’ll need a little help”. He slid over & out of the booth, I slid over, reached down to pick up my crutches, straightened/locked my braces, held up my hands and asked him for a “little help”. He had no clue that I wore braces, and he just stared at my legs … speechless. I smoothed it over by saying that I didn’t like the song and told him that maybe we should “sit this one out”. The rest of the evening was okay, but when it was time to go, I scooted all the way around to other side of the booth, and told one of the other girls to get me out of here, ‘Made it through college & grad school, got a great teaching job here in Denver, got married (an able-bodied guy who knew nothing about polio until we started dating). We have a wonderful grown & married daughter, and are totally accustomed to the occasional stare (What is it about leg braces!) and questions (some good & some not so good). Our life is good, and I hope that everybody reading this can identify with my saga. Don’t hesitate to share your story with the rest of us.
Love does conquer all. Go dream hope live love to all. And I wish to find my own love soon.
One of my Post-Polio support group friends just told me about this website . . . had no idea that there were so many other people (female polio-survivors married to able-bodied men) “in my shoes”; and it seems like we’ve all gone through the situations.
I contracted polio later (in my teens) than most folks; and it rendered both of my legs completely flail – zero movement (and eventually totally atrophied), so I was fitted with “Warm Springs” long-leg braces and went through extensive physical therapy. ‘Learned to stand-up (harder than it sounds), and eventually “walk” … using the conventual (two-point) “Swing” gait; and years later, it still works for me (except on sand)
I met my husband at a wedding reception in Phoenix. We were both assigned to the “Singles” table (no couples), and I was already seated (legs, braces & crutches out of view) when he arrived. Nice dinner, plenty of conversation and more than enough drinks; and eventually he asked me if I wanted to dance. Decision Time for me: I could simply say “No Thanks” or explain why I’m not much of a dancer … I chose the later, and he quickly replied that he really didn’t care that much about dancing.
As the reception wound-down, I stood-up, ready to leave and he said that he was ready to go, too; and walked me to the door. While the valet guys went to get our cars (yes, I drive with hand-controls), he asked for my phone number and offered me his. End-of-story? No
The next day (a Sunday), he called and we talked for well-over an hour; and decided to meet for Happy Hour a couple days later. Several more Happy Hours, then lots of dinner dates, etc. and then finally a 3-day weekend in Vegas (not our first overnight); and eventually, we got married, and moved cross-country to Marco Island.
To this day, we’re both are crazy about each other, and have a very active sex life. Here we are years later, and Don still enjoys taking off my braces (buckle-by-buckle, strap by strap); and I like having him do so … just adds to the pleasure of our foreplay. And having flail legs has it’s benefits … I (we) can do things that able-bodied couples can only dream about. Bottom-Line advice to readers … when the right partner (disabled or not) comes along, don’t hold back.
‘Lots of comments … looks like there are a lot of “us” out there … disabled women dating (or married to) able-bodied men. I contracted polio well-after the Salk vaccine was available (my mother was one of the first anti-vaxers, and not provide parental permission) Just after my 17th permission, I got sick, was taken the hospital, put into isolation, and (long story short) woke-up two absolutely flail legs. No damage to my arms, nor my lungs. Six+ months of intense physical therapy, custom-fitted long-leg braces (attached to the channels in my shoe heels, knee lock & knee pads and running up to the bar above my thighs. Learned to walk (actually, learned how to “swing”), went to college, dated-around and got married.
Dating was a bit tricky … some men turned-out to be attracted to me because I was disabled, while others couldn’t handle it. And then there were guys (not too many) like my husband, who had no problems with a disabled girlfriend/wife.
Our sex life is great (always has been) … and we both still enjoy the extra round of foreplay when he takes off my braces – very slowly. We can do things that other people can’t (my legs can go wherever he wants to put them)
Kids are grown and gone, so we now have more time (and spare cash) to enjoy life, and do more traveling (no special accommodations needed); and I can still get around pretty well with my trusty braces and lofstrands, but time will come when it’ll make sense to start using a chair (and I won’t have to wear my braces)
Advice to people reading this … do not let a disability “handicap” your life … and don’t worry about what you can’t do, but rather focus on what you can do!
I know for me, dating has been very hard. Especially when they find out that not only am I a paraplegic I’m also a little person that is 4’4ft. I was born with a dwarfism( me being a little person), but as of 2013,I was diagnose with spinal stenosis which led me to needing a surgery that didn’t take and which led me to have paralysis. Once we(me and the companion) talk and have lots of things in common, I feel some what comfortable to tell them my situation. Of course it ends up being a disappointment to where, either they just want friends or things change. Now, me being 44yrs old. I put Everything out on the table. So, I don’t set up right away for disappointment. But, even when doing that I don’t get many responses. So, I can definitely relate on here about dating or trying to find that special one.
It’s amazing that there are still Anti-Vaxers out there preaching their lies.
I’m the product of an Anti-Vax mother who refused to sign the “Consent” form for the Salk vaccine; and before I could reach the age of 18, and get the vaccine without parental approval, I contracted Polio … the bad kind … it totally paralyzed both of my legs (zero movement); and I’ve used long-leg braces (upper thigh to calipers attached to my shoes) and forearm crutches ever since.
Polio didn’t stop me from living-my-life (college, a career, husband and two kids), but it would have “nice” to not have-to strap-on my braces every single day of my life. On the other hand, my braces are actually as much a “part” of me as my arms; and they haven’t stopped me from wearing dresses, skirts and shorts; and even swimwear when we’re at the pool (and, No, I don’t swim with them)
And as my husband reminds me … I’ll never get fat-thighs (atrophy does have it’s benefits)